Money, money, money...

Things I have missed because I was in Mallow for two months without money:

Dublin Pride
Dublin Gay Film Festival
Brighton Pride

Not to mention the fact that I haven't been able to go to a gym since I came home, and am fast losing the gains I made throughout this last year as a result.

Now I hear that the social welfare office are not giving me as much as they should be for the time I wasn't working, so I am as broke as ever.

I'm getting quite sick of being constant poverty. Some of it is down to bad financial management skills and not living within my means, but when I take a step back and look at the whole thing, my means aren't that vast. Yet any of the interests I have that require money have been shelved, and it's not for the first time, and I'm getting pissed off with it. I've been under the shadow of debt of one kind or another for the past 8 years or so, and I am quite fucking fed up with it. Poverty is part and parcel of being a student, unfortunately it was also part of parcel of being an IT contractor in unstable employment, and the hype about Dublin should be believed: it is rip-off central.

I swear, I'm the first person to speak out against getting on the treadmill of the world, but while money is far from everything, it is even further from nothing. Ever since I left home at the age of 19, it has always been a problem for me. I've either had some and blown it too quickly, or not had enough to begin with. This is one of the reasons I picked a vocational course when I went back to college: I've spent my twenties struggling; I'll be damned if I'll do the same for my thirties as well. Reality has bitten a great big chunk out of my ass.

I still can't reconcile myself to a lifetime of working for a living in the way most people do though, but I reckon I'll have to play that one by ear.